It might be exam time if..

If you are wondering if it is exam time for college and university students here are some things to look for:
-Sales of energy drinks quadruple during college exams
-Tim Hortons sells 68% more coffee
-Students look 23% paler having not seen the sun for days at a time
-Students will be irrational due to lack of sleep
-The same clothes may be worn multiple days in a row as cleanliness is not the priority
-Vacant staring into the distance
-At least a weeks worth of stubble
-School books are seen open and students are actually reading
-Has a knowledge of strange subjects such as Spanish conjugation and derivatives of trig functions
-No knowledge of the date, month or year just know that they have to understand latching contacts by 9AM tomorrow
-Shows many signs of insanity including mumbling to themselves about I=V/Z

  

My Views on Dancing

Dancing is one of those things that I just cannot do I mean don't get me wrong I try hard but it just doesn't translate into good dancing. I have always been a person who like to see the point of what they're doing. I drove my high school math teachers crazy asking where I would need all the formulas but it turns out they are handy. Anyways I don't see the point of dancing, I have okay rythm but the coordination of a three legged panda so it makes it very difficult for me to dance well also I don't know what to do with my arms, like what are they there for? Dances are stupid because all it is is music and you don't hang out with anyone other than in your group of friends, if I were to do it all over again I would not go to prom but instead take my lovely girlfriend out for a nice dinner and we could get dressed up and take pictures and all that but not go to the dance, then I would have a nice big bonfire and have all the people that I would have hung out with anyways come over for smores and the such. All this would have cost way less and I would find it as much fun as dancing. I don't mind slow dancing, it is pretty easy, mostly you hug the person and try not to fall over while slowly moving your feet. Anyways as I'm writing this I am by myself dancing to Moves Like Jagger. Dancing by yourself is fun but has been known to cause injuries.
All the best,

Andrew  

Why Angry Birds is unrealistic

No this is not going to be a rant about how birds would never get angry at pigs. I actually find this to be quite a plausible scenario, no this is not a rant about birds that can explode, drop egg bombs and have surprise triplets while flying no this is a rant about how when the stuff falls on the pigs they never die. First off pigs are not the most intelligent of creatures, they wouldn't be able to make those elaborate structures. I mean honestly, when was the last tie you saw a pig doing anything other that lying in the mud, eating or going to the market? IT JUST DOESN'T HAPPEN!!!!!! Pigs are lazy the birds would have a much better chance of winning, especially if ostriches got involved, the pigs would be trampled by large ugly birds that look surprisingly like feather dusters with legs.Now the proper strategy for the birds would be to use peacocks to distract the pigs while the ostriches went all avian on their hineys! I'm sorry for the strong language but I feel very strongly about this subject. Also as the Alfred Hitchcock film shows birds are nothing to be messed with. I just feel that this is a totally unrealistic game as the birds are pretty dumb. I mean its the ultimate battle swine flu vs. avian flu. Also apparently the pigs can be crushed but not hurt. These are some reasons this is a stupid game.

McSexypants and 20 other names I refer to myself as

The Legend
The Amazing
Mr. Goodlookin'
The Nice Butt Boy
King Awesomepants the first
Sir Reginald of Awesometown
The Funnyman
Sir Jokinator
Mr. Hilarious
the guy who looks really good in his pyjama pants
the guy who has impeccable style
the incredibly sexy man
the pride of Alma
the man all women want and all the men want to be
Mr Muscles
Dr. Interesting
the reason Beethoven wrote music
the man who saved the world
the man with the plan
The Modest...

Video Game Tips

Hello world, today I choose to come to you with some very important tips for video games. I am not an incredible gamer but I can usually hold my own. I have several different strategies for my games the first being the butt clench. This technique works especially well for games like Angry Birds and other games in which you do something and there is a reaction for example when I shoot a bird I clench and then I let it go when it hits. This is the kind of skill that is involved with Angry Birds. My advice for Call of Duty is to relax when you play. When I’m uptight I get killed way more. Relax it’s just a game. Now for Mario Kart, Mario Kart is a tricky one and it has taken me years to master, the trick is to lean forward when you want to go faster, I know, I know people say it doesn’t change anything but I rock at Mario Kart and that’s my trick for it. These skills have been developed over my almost 20 years on this planet so use them wisely, with great power comes great responsibility.

All the best my friends,

Game wisely.

How to have some fun (and look good doing it)

There are plenty of ways in this world to have some fun. Hanging out with friends, playing video games, I like to think that most of life can be fun if we choose to make it that way. Today I was walking my cart to the cart area at Rona and decided to use it like a scooter I ran and scooted along and it was awesome, it was just icy enough that I could drift on it and it was sweet. Even when I'm doing tests I try to race against time. It makes my day better. As for looking good while having fun I suggest that you try to look as much like me as possible as I look freaking amazing.

All the best,

Camp Guy

Why the guitar is a stupid instrument

There are many reasons that the guitar is a stupid instrument, the foremost being that I can't play it. I have tried, I have failed, I have tried again and I have failed again.I am actually on my third attempt at learning this stupid thing and have yet to be able to play a decent song. The problem with a guitar is that you have to move your fingers so much and it makes it really tough to get the hang of, especially for me with my clumsyness. Another reason why guitars suck is that so many people think they are amazing, girls flock to the guy with the guitar and there is always that one guy bringing his guitar everywhere, this is a phenomenon which I like to call 'severe guitar douchebaggia' now don't get me wrong, if you're good at the guitar feel free to play but don't bring it if you can't back it up. I wish I could smash some guys guitars on the road just because they are idiots. So the moral of this post is if you own a guitar don't be a douche... well I guess even if you don't own a guitar you shouldn't be a douche but I think the normal person to douche ration is much higher for guitar players. Anyways have a good one, merry Christmas and goodnight.

What is the deal with salad!?!

Salad is one of those things that I just don't get. When I say salad I mean weird salads like potato salad or egg salad. Who ever thought hmmm these potatoes are delicious, you know what would make them better? Covering them with mayonnaise and other gross stuff and serving them cold. I Enjoy many of the different salad ingredients. I love potatoes I will probably post more about this in the future but potato salad is not appealing to me, I think its a waste of good potatoes. I like pasta this doesn't mean I want to throw it in a bowl with a lot of other weird stuff mix it up and eat it cold, that's just gross. I have always thought that there is way too much of it in church picnics. Some people are like "There is way too much hypocrisy in the church!!!!!!" and I'm like "There's way too much salad in the church!!!!!" now I'm not saying that one of these issues is more important I just think we should stop wrecking our food with mayonnaise and the such. I've had marshmallow salads and egg salads and all sorts of gross salads just to be polite and I'm through with that sort of stuff. People say why not egg salad? Its just like a deviled egg, to which I say true, it's not bad on sandwiches but I'm still not a fan. I preffer my eggs sunny side up so I can dip my toast in them, and this has worked for me for almost 20 years and I don't plan on changing it.
Until next time,
Andrew
 

The Joys of Plaid

Plaid is a wonderful thing, I personally wear it all the time. Plaid shirts have become my favorite type of shirt for a number of reasons. First, they go with any pants, jeans, khaki's, you name it plaid matches it. I personally really like wearing plaid with my striped shorts, though my girlfriend does not seem to like this as much. I have a terrible time picking out clothes in the morning and though I always look amazing other people sometimes don't but plaid usually works well with my other clothes. Another reason I like plaid is that no matter what I am doing I am rarely over/under dressed. I could wear a plaid button up shirt when playing sports with my friends or while at church. I find this very helpful as I do not need to think about where I am going in the morning as I am not by any stretch of the imagination, a morning person. Plaid offers me the perfect combination of style and comfort. It is classy yet not constricting. I plan on wearing a plaid tux at my wedding it looks so good on me. I am realizing that the great part about having a blog is that I can talk about pretty much anything and no one takes it too seriously.
Until next time, stay classy internet! or become classy! or... you know what forget I even said anything.